Blessings

I feel like I have been "running" for a week or two solid and I haven't even been to the gym! I have gotten so tied up with too many committments that I found myself very edgy today. I had absolutely NO "merry" in my Merry Christmas so I ran on to one more event, a concert at our church by a guy we all love to listen to. His name is JohnWaller and he talked tonight and sang about blessings. He told how he and his family had just spoken a blessing over their new son and then we sang that blessing. It made me think of all the ways God blesses us and how we need to ask him to bless us. We have received so many blessings this year. I know God blessed us so much through Luke's life. We continue to feel blessed to have so many friends and so much family but tonight I was reminded that we can also be a blessing to others and the way I was feeling today I definitely wasn't a blessing. It was so good to sit, listen, worship and connect with God and ask him to make me a blessing this year. I left with such a better attitude and a calmer heart. I pray this year I can slow down and remember to be a blessing.

Psalm 34:1 "I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips."

P.S. This is one of the pictures we took while trying to get a picture for our Christmas card - only the most photogenic one isn't looking right!

a lamb...

This week Sydney and I are in the Living Christmas Tree at our church. It is a big commitment (7 shows in 5 days) but always so rewarding. Sydney is just beside herself that she is finally in it. She is on the front row of the children's song and does her actions so well. She just loves to perform. She is also in the biblical part, but I haven't seen her yet since she chose to walk with her friends instead of her mom! She is SO independent at 7 years old.

Each night they put Jesus on the cross as we sing this beautiful song, "It took a Lamb". It just makes Jesus so real. First to see this innocent baby then seeing the same innocent man on the cross brings tears every night. It seems like I would get used to seeing it every night, but every night I find myself in tears. To think Jesus endured so much just to save each one of us is overwhelming. In the midst of all the hubub of the holiday season it is nice to have a visual reminder of the gift God gave us in his Son and the way he gave his life for us. I pray you will be blessed this Christmas season with some time to reflect on the gift of Jesus - an innocent lamb sacrificed so we can be forgiven.

Plugged In

There's an outlet in my bathroom at my Mom's house that when I plug in my hair straightener and try to use it, the plug always falls out. The connection is just loose from years of plugging things in and pulling plugs out. It is really frustrating when you want to keep your appliance plugged in and it keeps falling out. I was just sitting here listening to Mercy Me and thinking about God in that way. No matter how hard I try to stay "plugged in" sometimes I just get "pulled out" by life. I guess that is just a daily struggle in the world we live in (at least in mine!). I want my plug to stay in tight so that I am constantly plugged in to God. I pray often that he will fill me with such a desire for him that the earthly pulls can't make my connection loose. I am thankful that God desires a relationship with us and keeps pulling us back in when we fall out. He is just like that electricity - always on - just waiting for us to plug into him so he can fill us with his strength, spirit, power and love.

Ephesians 3:16-18 "I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in you inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power together with all the saints to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ."

Thirsty?

I can remember the two best Diet Cokes I have ever had. You may think this is weird, but if you know me I always have a drink near me. Usually Diet Coke, water or tea. My first (best) DC was in New York City after a LONG day of walking and sightseeing. I remember how thirsty I was as we walked into the hotel and how good that DC was. My second (best) DC was at the end of the second day of the Susan G. Komen 3-day 60 mile walk for breast cancer. My friends and I walked up a hill at the end the 23rd mile of the day and there at the top was a Quick Trip. Of course we detoured in for a much needed DC to quench our thirst. In a recent sermon the pastor talked about Matthew 5:13 where Jesus tells us we are the salt of the earth. The pastor talked about how salt made us feel - thirsty. (I know because Mexican food is salty and I always need more DC) He shared how we should make people thirsty for God if we are truly being the salt of the earth. Our very lives should make people thirsty so we can share how God can quench that thirst over and over again no matter how thirsty we get. He satisfies our thirst more than anything here on earth can. He is our living water. I want to be thirsty for God and I want to make others thirsty for more than Diet Coke!

I'm back...

Sorry it has been so long. I've let life get me too busy and we were gone a week on vacation! We have had a few monumental things happen. Hogan got all his hair cut off and Sydney has lost both her front teeth. Both of them look so different now! We had a great time as a family in Orlando. We did one day at Magic Kingdom, one day at Wet and Wild (where I screamed on most rides - they were crazy, scary slides!) and one day at the Nick Hotel (seriously overpriced room, but well worth watching the kids have so much fun. We even got slimed.) It was good to get away. I have also been able to get together with Luke's nurse from Scottish-Rite. It was really good to connect with her again, I enjoy her friendship. She was our weekend nurse and we became really close talking each Saturday and Sunday. I thank God that he gave me two friends in the nurses who took care of Luke. It is good to be able to talk to them since they knew Luke.

While in Tampa we went to church with Eric's sister. I loved their church and their pastor(http://www.idlewild.org/). He used a verse I loved. Micah 6:8 " And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God." He talked about living compartmentalized lives - do we do or act certain ways around certain people or are we an open book, living for Jesus everday in all we do? Do we wear masks everyday and not just at Halloween? Does what we do on Friday match what we do on Sunday? God requires so little of us yet it can seem monumental in this earthly world. He just wants us to walk humbly with him. The pastor defined humbly or humility as total dependence on God. Walking with God through the big and the small in life, the good and the bad, the mountains and the valleys. We may not live perfect lives, but as believers we are forgiven in our walk with our God.

Broken

Well, I did it tonight. I broke my bowl. This idea all began from a blog I follow of another mother who lost a baby. Back in May my brother's family was here and I was reading the blog on my computer one night with Kirsten. This girl told how she had read in a grief book that it would be good therapy to break a piece of pottery. She felt led to break a pitcher one night and God really touched her as she put it back together... Of course, within the week my sister (in-law) Kirsten had bought me a bowl to break when I was ready, but I wasn't ready. I put it on the fridge in the laundry room and have looked at it often, but haven't felt the need to break it. Tonight I was overwhelmed as I lay sleepless in bed, praying, that I had to get up and break the bowl. With many tears, I sat outside and held the bowl for a long time. It was really pretty. It felt good to hold it whole, but I knew I needed to break it. Memories of Luke played in my head. I thanked God for his life and the journey we have gone through. Joy, tears, trust, faith, total surrender. I felt God saying "I need all of you - broken" - I thought of Jesus and how he gave his body to be broken on the cross for all of us - it was then that I could break the bowl. (Of course it didn't break when I threw it down and it made a really loud noise at 1a.m. so I went into the shop and used a hammer. Doesn't God always bring a smile in the midst of tears!) I picked up the pieces and carefully carried them inside. I began to glue them back together thinking of how God puts us back together. We may still bear the scars from our brokeness but we can be whole again. I love my bowl even more now. I know it is in the brokeness that God can flow through us and use us for His purpose. My bowl sits in my china cabinet now so I can see it daily and thank God for using us, taking care of us and most of all for loving us.

Psalm 147 :1-5 "Praise the Lord. How good to sing praises to our God! How delightful and how fitting...He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds. He counts the stars and calls them all by name. How great is our Lord! His power is absolute! His understanding is beyond comprehension!"

I like to eat...

I called my brother Rob, this week to see what to order at the Thai restaurant I was going to. A lot of our conversations revolve around food and cooking. We both love to eat and experiment. My dad and I loved to talk about food too and now I find myself talking about what I have cooked with his brother Jerry whenever I call him. As I thought about how important food is to me - it made me think of God in the same way. Do I hunger for God? Do I crave God like I crave Mexican food and chocolate? I have found this year that the closer I get to God the more I hunger for him and desire fellowship with him. I find myself going to him many times a day and he can satisfy me much more than chips-n-salsa can!!! I live to eat and I want to live for God!

"Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled."

Matthew 5:6

"You satisfy me more than the richest feast.I will praise you with songs of joy." Psalm 63:5